Re: Stop your whining, Nov. 20
To the Editor:
In his letter, Jeff Gardiner tells us that homosexuals aren't the only ones to feel lonely. He writes that single heterosexuals "suffer from loneliness in silence for the most part without all this 'Woe is me I'm so oppressed!'" It seems Mr. Gardiner has overlooked the fact that heterosexuals in our society are 'not' oppressed, hence, there is no reason for them to go around saying "Woe is me I'm so oppressed!" without looking like complete idiots.
Mr. Gardiner also assures us that "this feeling of loneliness felt by the gay community is a human feeling, not a gay feeling." Although loneliness is indeed a human feeling, the loneliness that a single gay person might feel may often be much more complicated than the loneliness that a single heterosexual person might feel. This could be due to a number of reasons which may include not knowing anyone else who is gay, feeling ostracized from family and community upon "coming out," not having any support from loved ones and not knowing where to turn, or perhaps even just feeling isolated and lonely because they haven't been able to "come out" and feel they must keep their sexual orientation a secret. I'm sure that it can be lonely for a gay person (whether single or not) simply to not be completely accepted by the society in which they live. I highly doubt that "lonely" heterosexuals know how this truly feels. I'm sure I'm just scratching the surface here.
Because I am heterosexual, I cannot possibly be able to completely comprehend the feelings, frustrations and experiences of those who are homosexual, no matter how hard I may try. However, being a visible minority who is also female, that is, being a member of groups that are not always regarded as equals in society either, I can truthfully say that I probably understand more so than those who have never experienced any somewhat similar kind of discrimination. I cannot claim to speak for the gay community and so I welcome all letters from members of the gay community who may wish to correct me on anything I have said.