Volume 93, Issue 22

Wednesday, October 6, 1999


Equal rights regardless of race or sex

Reputation shouldn't alter action

Charity a run away success

King's misses family love

Crossing the wordsmiths

A Home-comedy of errors

A Home-comedy of errors

At least no one was run over at this year's Homecoming festivities. Despite the lack of vehicular assault, Western's annual alumni schmooze was nonetheless interesting.

Instead of numerous arrests and injuries, Western was treated to a bizarre and hilarious Homecoming weekend. This comedy can basically be presented in three acts.

Act 1 – The selling of football game tickets. If nothing else, the sale of tickets this year proved that everything revolves around the almighty dollar.

In a move that would make any corporate Chief Executive Officer proud, this year's Homecoming staff managed to swindle a good percentage of the student body into throwing away their hard earned cash to an event they didn't care about.

The sale of strictly football game tickets was restricted so that Homecoming staff could more or less force students into shelling out $10 for tickets to both the game and the victory party in the University Community Centre.

Last week, I was approached by many angry students who were left with no other option but to pay for both, so they could attend the football game.

Despite the University Students' Council's much ballyhooed slogan of protecting the students' interests, this was purely a financial move aimed at ensuring the victory party was well attended and as result, the USC made as much (or lost as little) money as possible.

Act 2 – Western's public relations nightmare. The university's complete unpreparedness for the demand of seating at the football game shone through in the days leading up to J.W.'s last Homecoming stand.

At the pre-game press conference held earlier in the week, Western's head football coach Larry Haylor made the bold statement that any and all students showing up to the game would be accommodated, ticket or no ticket. He even went so far as to remark that students would be able to stand on the sidelines with him, if that's what it took.

The coach's school spirit and eagerness to appease the student body is commendable, but the ensuing situation would have been a riot waiting to happen. Realizing this, Western's administration went into overdrive in a valiant attempt to brush Haylor's comments under the rug and save the day.

In Saturday's London Free Press, Helen VandeBovenKamp of Western's Intercollegiate Athletics was paraphrased as saying no one showing up without a ticket would be admitted for safety reasons. Oddly enough just a few pages later, Haylor was quoted as saying, "We're trying very hard to be inclusive. We would like everyone who wants to take part in the final Homecoming to be able to."

Ah, the hypocritical nature of bureaucracy. Still, this three stooges, "he said, she said" act by the university provided even more laughter and hilarity to the week.

Act 3 – The game. If Homecoming weekend was the joke, the game was the punch line. From the get go, what was supposed to be a hotly contested battle between two of the nation's top football teams, was a cakewalk for the Mustangs. The blowout itself was good for a laugh.

However, in the stands, one had to chuckle at the ingenuity and creativity of Western students. The scholars amongst us showed off their poetic brilliance with such rhymes as "They're Golden, they're Hawks, they suck each other's cocks" and various other little ditties which should not be repeated.

Standing in the rain, these chants echoing in my ear, I began to long for simpler times when all we had to worry about was the odd hit and run accident.

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Copyright The Gazette 1999