Volume 95, Issue 47

Friday, November 23, 2001
 
Search the Archives:
Tips for searching

News
Editorial
Opinions
Entertainment
Campus and Culture
Sports
Submit Letter
Contact Us
About the Gazette
Archives


OPINIONS

Praise The Gazette for shining a light on 'the movement'

Soph asks SSSC for big-time admission of 'we screwed up'

Recombobulator

Recombobulator

The Recombobulator: more fun than a night of oral sex at a trashy local nightclub – and less filling too!



Q: My grandpa smells like Bingo.

– Tim Camp, Political Science II

A: You prankster! That's not a question.



Q: Why do they only sell blond hair dye in the University Community Centre pharmacy?

– Jane Watson, Anthropology IV

A: Brown hair dye can be found in what the locals call "the mighty River Thames." It's actually a river of brown hair dye. But Jane, when you're lowering yer noggin, don't get bopped by dead hookers, syringes or other flowing debris.



Q: I've been injected with 400 CCs of 'funk' and I can't stop groovin'. Do you know of a cure for this?

– Mike Murphy, English IV

A: There's no hope for ya kid, once you're infected, you got it for life.



Q: I'm a little white boy looking to become 'hard-core.' You got any advice?

– Thomas Silverton, Business III

A: Feel free to pop open cans of 'whoop-ass' at any time. Oh and don't be afraid to re-upholster anyone's ass. That should get you to at least 'medium core.'



There are plenty of times to think of questions for the Recombobulator – like when you're lying cold, naked, alone and drunk in a gutter. Send questions c/o gazette.opinions@uwo.ca


To Contact The Opinions Department:
gazette.opinions@uwo.ca

Copyright The Gazette 2001