I'm no humourless bible-thumper!
Peace beats war, life beats death
As they say in the Old West Yee haw! It's time for the... I say... it's time for the recom-humdinger-mabobber. I'll be a monkey's uncle, this here jimmy sure is a laugh-maker!
Q: What's with those damn Irish gettin' all the cool holidays? What the hell does Canada have that's even close to St. Patrick's Day? John Horton, Mechanical Engineering III
A: Are you kidding? We have Queen Victoria day (aka 'May two-four'). Ancient Canadian folklore has it that Queen Victoria once beat ol' St. Patty at 'century club' and that's how we acquired the land we now call Owen Sound.
Q: If a Jack Russell terrier is born in Germany and has a tendency to walk around with a cane, isn't it more of a German shepherd? Andrea McSorley, Kinesiology II
A: Either way, if you cook it up with corn and potatoes, you can make one hell of pie shepherd or German your pick!
Q: It's pretty obvious this whole democracy thing isn't working out. How about we implement some sort of honocracy rule by the honour system? Asif Mundar, Social Science I
A: Sounds great! We won't need policemen, so they can all get sex changes and become hot-dog ladies. Oh, and judges can cut their robes off at the waist and prance around like judicial belly dancers.
Q: My roomie wants to know do guys like girls with short hair or long hair? Tina Bladman, MIT III
A: Rule of thumb: the hairier the better. Just kidding. The novelty of a new haircut drives just about everyone wild with joyous rapture.
Q: How does one go about becoming a Zamboni driver? Casey Malone, Physics II
A: Just ask the inventor of the Zamboni Giovanni Zamboni. "Yoo see, yoo a gatta be a mad-a-man with-a-the riding-a-lawnmower."
As they say in Sweden, this was once again, bork bork, a smorgasbord of hilarity funded by incredibly high taxes and Ikea I mean funded by jokes from all the little Mustangs of London. We'd like to thank one Mustang in particular Sally (the lady who was asked to put her flat feet on the ground).