Volume 96, Issue 12
Wednesday September 18, 2002

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Fat, gun totin' Texans invade Call The Office

By Dale Wyatt
Gazette Staff

Gazette file photo

What do you get when four fat Texans get together and start a band? The answer is Bowling For Soup.

The Gazette had the chance to chat with guitarist and lead vocalist Jaret Von Erich about being fat, hailing from Texas, Britney Spears and writing music. The following is what the big man had to say.

Jaret on being fat:

You know what is really hard, is for fat guys to tour in England – the food sucks. Pizza Hut is not the same thing. Sure, it looks the same, red building and everything, but it's not. It sucks. Fat guys like us hate it.

My guitarist is pushing 400 pounds, you know. But, people like us 'cause deep inside I think people really like fat guys. Think of Santa Claus – who doesn't like that fat bastard?

On Britney Spears:

I'm going to go out on a limb and take one for men and say I want and am willing to do anything – let me stress the word anything – with Britney Spears. I am talking backwards, sideways, anything. The opportunity has not come up yet, but I was in her movie for about a second and a half. The rest of my band got cut out though – they were pissed.

On having fun:

We do crazy shit all the time. We will pretty much do anything. In fact, I am willing to say I have not yet had something come up that I wouldn't do. Craziness is just a part of this band. It is not to get recognition or anything, we just want to get a reaction out of people and have fun. That's why I'm still in this band.

On writing songs about girls:

Most of our songs are written from experience. I know about chicks. I was always the fat kid in school that got shit on a lot. Plus, who doesn't like girls?

I write songs like I talk. I don't put a lot of hidden meanings into my stuff. It's nice when kids e-mail us and they say they can relate. We've all been there and it's nice to find out you're not the only one. I do exaggerate a lot 'cause it makes a better song.

On coming from Texas, home of the dumbest man to ever run the free world:

I didn't vote for the fuckin' guy. I don't really get into politics. We're not really the kind of people that think we should get involved in all that kind of shit.

But, hey, we've got the death penalty [in Texas]. We like to kill people who kill people and we love to carry guns. But seriously, we don't all ride horses carrying guns. Any Canadians who visit Texas never want to leave. It's a cool place and people don't really get shot. It's like Disneyland for adults.

On his hangover:

I have a hangover, so today I wanted a really big cheeseburger and french fries. I don't usually eat french fries. Last night we did a huge festival with Sevendust, Jimmy Eat World, etc. and the hospitality lady loved me so we got retarded drunk for free. Plus Oklahoma beer is only like 3.2 per cent so you tend to drink a lot more. We all drank our weight in beer, so I needed some greasy shit.

On the current tour:

This is the best tour we have ever done. The shows have been off the hook. The kids really know the song that is on the radio right now ("Girl All The Bad Guys Want"). It's really different from the past when we were unsure about turnouts. Now we show up and people actually know our songs. We can even see kids singing along.

On why the London show is free:

We are doing a lot of free shows on this tour. We have not got a lot of love from Much Music and stuff, so we wanted to do some shows to get some kids out – hell, they can even bring their parents. After all, we are the third greatest rock band ever and the best live one.

Bowling For Soup are playing a free show at Call The Office this Thursday. Doors open at 9 p.m.


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