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Volume 96, Issue 99
Friday April 4, 2003
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GAZETTE ALUMNI SOCIETY

TODAY'S COMIC

WEEKEND EDITION
LAST UPDATED: Friday April 4, 2003 - 3:30 p.m.

Varsity Athletics: fighting for survival

Walking through the baron bowels of Alumni Hall, you will pass a row of squash courts whose doors are locked, lights are turned out and windows are hermetically sealed. The rationale behind the court's condemnation is that no one has anted up for their occupancy fees.

Many would assume the Alumni Hall squash courts to be the home of the dynastic Western men's squash team, but the Mustangs have not used the facilities since 1994, despite paying the occupancy fees for the courts until this year.



Western solicited to overturn USC Dental Plan

Western's Campus and Community Affairs Committee debated the merits of the University Students' Council dental plan referendum last night, bringing into question whether the university should interfere in the implementation of USC fees.



Indie voices on the war in Iraq

As the war in Iraq continues, the public is bombarded with information from a wide variety of media sources. The Gazette decided to examine electronic, independent media outlets and present an overview of the current perspectives these sources offer.



Wham, SPAM, no thank you man

Everyone hates SPAM. Not only does it look, taste and smell horrible, it also sucks to get it in your inbox.

In a move contrary to the Acceptable Use Policy of Western's Information Technology Services, several students recently used Western mailing lists to advertise their sublets, rental availabilities and furniture for sale.

 


Western debates legality of war

As the war in Iraq rages on, so does national and global debate. Yesterday, Western played host to a forum discussing the war's ongoing implications.

"Canada, the United Nations and the war in Iraq," a forum hosted by Western's Muslim Students' Association, invited Western law professor Michael Lynk and education professor Rebecca Coulter to share their views on the Iraqi war.

 

MORE NEWS HEADLINES:
> NEWS FOR DUMMIES: War, SARS and beaver punching
> Iraqi War: roundup
> Teacher testing critiqued
> SATIRE: Saddam's birthday

> News Briefs

 

It is with great sadness that The Gazette announces the passing of our beloved mascot Pedro the Gnome.
Pedro is survived by his wife Juanita and approximately 764 children scattered over the Earth over his long, fruitful lifetime.

He worked by turns as a gatekeeper, jockey, novelist and shoe model. Pedro spoke nine languages and enjoyed travel, gardening and bird watching.

His fondest dream was to one day meet the Keebler elves, and we’re sure that wherever he is now, they’re welcoming him with delicious snack crackers.

The editor-in-chief of The Gazette has been hospitalized and sedated due to grief, and is expected to return to work next week.


Beth Kerim/Gazette

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Rejects rock out the All-American way

They may call themselves rejects, but Oklahoma's pop-rock quartet The All-American Rejects are gaining ground as America's newest pop sensations.



MORE A&E HEADLINES:

>
Campus Music Explosion invades The Spoke
> CONCERT REVIEW: Taking Back Sunday took over last Sunday
> Where's Chip?: Stop spouting crap!
> CD REVIEW: All-Skanadian Club 4: The Best in Canadian Ska
> Wiggity wack: Local DJs rise up at The Wave
> OUTSIDE THE BOX: Le Placard

SPORTS

The Gambling Man
Avalanche over Care Bears?

Just over two months since his ejection from the Super Bowl for what authorities called "an unfortunate incident involving Tampa Bay Buccaneers coach Jon Gruden, a can of cannola oil, a bearskin rug and four pounds of ground beef," the Gambling Man returns for the looming NHL playoffs.

MORE SPORTS HEADLINES:
> Beyond the arc: Shaq attack might get wacked
> College forever: No sour grapes; raise a Bubba to Don for his worthy cause

CAMPUS & CULTURE

Two students love doing it all night long

All-nighters can be long, lonely and incredibly stressful.

This we all know, but what exactly happens during these long cramming sessions and how much work really gets done? The Gazette’s Nicole D’Cruz and Ila Seegobin took up the challenge of pulling an all-nighter for both academic and journalistic purposes. The rule: stay up all night. The catch: actually get some studying, research and/or essay writing done. Everything else is fair game; whatever tactics needed to stay awake are allowed. The only other rule: write a log of the night’s events.

MORE C&C HEADLINES:
> Doctors say sleep or be stupid
> Are students studying right?

SMOKER OF THE WEEK

If you couldn’t tell by his flowing locks and dreamy eyes, our Smoker of the Week is none other than Gazette Editor-in-Chief Chris Lackner. Chris began smoking in the name of love — seriously. See, when he was 15-years-old, he worked at a summer resort and fell in love with an iron-lunged young lady. Chris feared if his crush ever found out his lungs were pure as the driven snow, they could never share a life together. He returned home to London that winter and puffed up a storm, determined to woo his sensual smoker the next summer. But alas, upon his return, he found out she failed Grade 10 general math and had to go to summer school. To this day, he longs for her sweet smokin’ kiss.

Smokin Stats:
Number of student newspapers run into the ground: 1
USC dollars in Gazette budget spent on Players: $6,342
Number of Gazette staffers who wish Chris well at The National Post: All of them... awwwww.


© 2002 THE GAZETTE