Volume 96, Issue 99
Friday, April 4, 2003

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Warning girls: fun boys alert

To the Editor:

How many sleezy wannabe frat boys does it take to screw in a lightbulb?! Apparently none; instead they decide to nix the bulbs and just wear the lamp shades on their heads.

A few girlfriends and I were at The Phoenix on Saturday night minding our own business when a couple of guys came over and attempted to pick us up. Picture the two brothers from Night at the Roxbury, but, instead of the hideous disco shirts, they were sporting T-shirts with monkeys on them. How sexy.

However, they still shared the same mental capacity and same sorry pick-up approaches. It wasn't just the T-shirts or even the lamp shades that turned us off. Nor was it the fact that one shade said "easy fuck" and the other "cooter warmer." The final straw came when these two knobs tried to woo us with an invitation to an "ever-classy" downtown establishment.

They continued with their drunken babble for far too long, assuring us it would be good times. But, after a repeated decline and a good laugh, we left dumb and dumber for a couple of drinks at the bar. So, we just wanted to warn all the girls out there to watch out for these, um, "playboys." They will be the ones with the vacant stares, asking for directions to the University Community Centre from the Concrete Beach.

Lisa Wright
Psychology III

Michelle Danker
Kinesiology III

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