Volume 96, Issue 61
Friday, January 17, 2003

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Purple Pipe: Jimmy Grozelle
 
Niru Somayajula/Gazette
 

The holiday break has been an extremely difficult time for the Purple Pipe. Cooped up in the office collecting dust, the pent-up frustrations of the magical shaft came to bare as it spewed words of abomination concerning three sports editors and everything Christmas.

"Throw me a frickin' bone here boys, this lame-ass shit you guys write everyday just doesn't do it for your readership. You need the Pipe.

"I don't know about the rest of the basketball population on campus, but there's nothing more enthralling than watching Jimmy Grozelle navigate his way through a forest of gigantaurs, throw up some crazy-ass shot and continuously bury it through the net, along with a dagger through the hearts of useless post tools everywhere. I pity the foo who has to deal with that shit – give that man the Pipe."

The Pipe has spoken.

Mustangs point guard Jimmy Grozelle is the recipient of the Purple Pipe this week. Grozelle recently scored 75 points over the course of three games, including 31 against McMaster, 23 against Carleton and 21 against Ottawa.

– Jordan Bell



Kickin' it...

"I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl who looked good I would call her, I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a six foot Impala."

Jimmy Grozelle has satisfied the second wish, but unfortunately, he has yet to fulfill the first (we're not sure about the third and fourth).

Fortunately, The Gazette has come to save the day and is letting Grozelle be the voice on campus about everything basketball. It may not add inches, but it will definitely make him feel like he's part of the Ming dynasty.


What are the main ingredients to being a great point guard?

I think the main ingredients are being a leader, seeing the floor and basically spreading the love.



What do you think of [Dallas Maverick] Steve Nash's hair?

I think it's outrageous. I can't really talk, though, because my hair was out of control there for awhile. I don't know how he puts up with it.



Who's the biggest trash talker you have ever faced in your university career?

The biggest trash talker I have ever met is one of my former teammates [and now assistant coach] Matt Tweedie. He was always jawing, talking to other teams, talking to guys in practice. He was always just running his mouth.



What are the main reasons for the team's six-game losing streak?

Our injuries – especially missing Nick Salomons – above and beyond anything else.



Do you think unwarranted hype has been placed on [high school phenom] LeBron James?

In five years, I think he's going to be one of the top three players in the world, but right now I think the pay-per-view coverage and all the hype is ridiculous.



Do you think high school athletes, like LeBron James, should go to college instead of straight to the pros?

Depends on their situation. In a perfect world, I would tell everyone to go to college. But if I had $10 million waiting for me and I could leave, it's tough to pass up.



What did you do for New Year's Eve this year?

We went to Ottawa, our nation's capital, and I forget everything.



Amen to that.

–Jordan Bell

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