Purple Pipe: Derek
STEP FOR MAN. Purple Pipe winner Derek Rhodenizer lunges at an innocent
camera girl named Beth.
The fencing team is
getting a lot of love this week (a full page feature will appear in the
sports section tomorrow), but the performance of Derek Rhodenizer of the
fencing team deserves recognition, and it comes in the form of the famous
Rhodenizer (affectionately referred to as "The Rodent" by teammates,
or maybe just Gazetters) impressively beat all comers at the Ontario University
Athletics Sectionals on the weekend at McMaster University, finishing
first in the individual sabre competition.
The captain of the men's sabre team scored a total of 30 points in six
bouts, while his foes could only muster a paltry nine points.
The Pipe holds a special place in its heart for any athlete who carries
a weapon of destruction, as in its former days, the Pipe was used to beat
off puck bunnies, hookers and juiced-up goons.
However, the Pipe fears nothing and rumours in the athletic world are
that it has issued a formal challenge against any of three fencing swords
(sabre, foil and epee). It's common knowledge that a plumbing pipe from
Canadian Tire (did I just say that out loud) is unstoppable when wielded
by an ass-crack bearing plumber.
The fencing team continues their season on the weekend of Feb. 1 at the
OUA Sectionals in Toronto.
Kickin' it with a master of the sword
The Gazette was apprehensive about arriving at the fencing teams
practice they do have swords and all. But eventually we got enough
balls and sat down with Purple Pipe winner Derek Rhodenizer to discuss
some sporting topics.
Who is going to win the Super Bowl this year?
The Raiders will win because they're crazy and they're representing old
What's your favourite sport besides fencing?
Volleyball. I played volleyball all through high school and intramurals
Do you have any pre-fencing rituals?
I wear the same underwear [hopefully washed] and same shirt every bout.
What's better, being on the fencing team or writing for The
Gazette (Derek wrote for The Gazette last semester)?
They're two completely different things writing is something I
really enjoyed doing, but fencing is something I have a passion for.
Who would win in a fencing match between Zorro and The Count of
Zorro has the form and the quality tactics, so no doubt it would be Zorro.
What's the strangest thing that has happened to you in a bout?
Sometimes you get to know the other competitors on the circuit. One time
I was beating a guy and we knew each other pretty well. As we went by
each other at the end of one of the points, I unplugged his electric [tool
that registers points], so, for the next point, his electric wouldn't
work and they couldn't figure out why.
If you weren't fencing, what would you be doing?
Anything they would take me in. I came here wanting to play volleyball,
tried out and got cut. I was trying to find a sport to play because I
wanted to play a varsity sport. Paul Simms [a fellow fencer] liked my
build and needed a fourth guy for the sabre team.