Tom Brady: American Hero?
By Ian Van Den Hurk
Gazette file photo
THERE. I’M TOM BRADY. Brady, who also used to throw
it around with Britney Spears, quarterbacked the New England
Patriots to victory over the Carolina Panthers in Superbowl
New England Patriots’ quarterback Tom Brady has been called
many things during his short and illustrious career.
One of my roommates can be found riding the Patriots bandwagon
around our living room every Sunday, dubbing Brady as “America’s
Since he crammed Brady in with other legends such as Johnny Appleseed
and Paul Bunyan, I thought I’d evaluate Brady and see if
he really qualifies for such a prominent title.
As you’ll recall, Brady was a nobody at the beginning of
the 2000 NFL season. A few months later, though, the former sixth-round
draft pick ascended through the ranks of professional football
to super stardom.
In Super Bowl XXXVI, Brady stole the show and Super Bowl Most
Valuable Player from Kurt Warner and the Rams. From that season
on, his legend grew.
At the tender age of 26, Brady’s conquests already include
two Super Bowls, American Pie sex enthusiast Tara Reid and “the
Donald’s” daughter, Ivanka Trump. OK, I admit the last
two weren’t exactly football-related, but there’s no
getting around the fact that Tom’s dashing good looks — www.women.com
voted Brady as one of the “12 Sexiest Guys in Sports” and
are on record as saying, “the ladies all agree he makes a
dreamy Prince Charming and does it get any sexier than that cleft
in his chin?” — I cannot possibly argue with such a
vote of confidence.
Brady doesn’t stop with slaying the ladies, however. He’s
also been an MVP slayer. Warner was coming off his second MVP award
in three years when Brady took him to the cleaners in Super Bowl
XXXVI. Brady also dropped 2003 co-MVP’s Steve McNair and
Peyton Manning like a sack of cement on his run to this year’s
Oddly, however, Brady was not even elected to the Pro Bowl, the
NFL’s version of the all-star game. While many of his statistics
don’t measure up to other “elite” quarterbacks,
it’s the intangibles that make the man.
Despite having no supporting cast on offense and a group of elfish
wide receivers whom he must sneak into R-rated movies and onto
roller coasters (the Pats frequent Disneyland a lot since Brady
keeps winning Super Bowl MVP), Brady has put up the most astonishing
numbers of all: 6-0 all-time in the playoffs, two Super Bowl championships
and two Super Bowl MVP awards.
Plain and simple, Brady is the most clutch quarterback in the
NFL today — he just finds a way to win.
Now that I think about it, maybe my roommate was right. Is there
anything Brady can’t do? Hell, he even punted once against
the Dolphins this year… to the one yard line! Most punters
in the league can’t do that and it’s their only job.
But, if Brady is going to claim the title of “America’s
Greatest” he needs to be more than a great athlete and ladies
man. He needs to be involved off the field. Coincidentally, Brady
could be found showing his support at last week’s State of
the Union address. “I was there as a Patriot, literally and
figuratively” Brady said.
Brady tossed three touchdown passes on Sunday, but as usual, numbers
don’t tell the full story. After an uncharacteristic mistake
by Brady, who heaved a wild pass on third down in the Panthers
end zone that was intercepted, Brady rebounded like all the greats.
The gunslinger responded to the turnover by leading New England
to 10 points on its next two drives and set up Adam Vinatieri’s
game-winning field goal with just four seconds left.
OK, so now it’s time for the moment of truth: a decision
has to be made. Brady is a superstar athlete. He’s a favourite
with the opposite sex. He’s a natural born leader. He owns
two Super Bowl rings. And he doesn’t seem to mind playing
Is there anything he can’t do? Well, he can’t stop
winning; I know that much is true. But is Tom Brady really America’s
Let’s put it this way. If my roommate will slow down that
bandwagon just a bit, I’ll jump on faster than old Paul Bunyan
could drop a tree.