A winter wonderland of stupid criminals
By Laura Katsirdakis
Ah, London: home to an abundance of petty criminals. How you
A five month investigation by the London Police Department
has concluded with the closure of a local escort service last
Thursday. Gerald Cunningham, a 54 year-old Londoner, was charged
with Living off the Avails of Prostitution and Proceeds of
Crime, because of his ownership and operation of the service,
called “Cuddles,” explained Const. Paul Martin,
spokesperson for the LPD.
Former clients of the escort service asked, “Who’s
going to cuddle us now?”
The LPD would also like to inform the public they have knowledge
of a Hell’s Angels residence in London. They are not
disclosing the address of the house, in case some ill advised
citizens decide to go egg the home or ask the mobsters to support
their pretzel business.
On campus, the holidays saw a minimum number of break and
enters due to the hiring of a contract security company to
patrol all buildings, explained Elgin Austen, spokesman for
the Campus Community Police Service. Campus buildings were
patrolled 24 hours a day, in addition to the usual CCPS patrols.
Some expensive tools were taken from construction sites, he
noted, adding that the sites, while active, belong to the construction
company and were not patrolled by the contracted security company.
On Wednesday, Jan. 7, a shoplifter was caught red-handed trying
to steal a toque from The BookStore, Austen said. The thief
was apprehended by store security and charged under the Code
of Student Conduct. The BookStore management chose not to press
criminal charges due to the circumstances surrounding the incident.
Maybe management felt pity for someone dumb enough to attempt
to thieve The BookStore and not even take a book.
In true Western fashion, CCPS reported a number of disturbances
on campus Monday night after the bars closed. There were four
liquor license act charges laid.
On both Dec. 15 and Jan. 6, impaired drivers were apprehended
and charged at the Windemere Manor and the Talbot College intersections
respectively, Austen said.
The winter weather has also been keeping campus police busy.
On Jan. 10 and 11 pipes were bursting all over campus. In both
Somerville House and the Dental Science Building, burst pipes
caused flooding and took caretakers some time to clean up,
On Sunday, police responded when a female slipped on ice and
injured her ankle. Austen noted it is important at this time
of year to remember to watch your step outdoors.
At 1:51 a.m. Saturday morning police were called to deal with
an intoxicated male seen staggering outside Essex Hall. When
the drunk was approached he fled into the -20C night, prompting
police to conduct an extensive search for fear he might come
to harm in the extreme cold. The male returned to Essex at
2:30 a.m. unharmed.