Lent and perogies in the Twilight Zone
Campus Life Editor
Sometimes I feel like Superman.
Not only because I am able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, but specifically
because like Clark Kent, I too live a double life. I call my story Maggie Wrobel:
Caught Between a Steak and Veggie Burger.
My problem is this: my boyfriend is a vegan, and my parents have been on the
Atkins diet for the last two years and don’t show any signs of quitting
it any time soon.
For those unfamiliar with veganism, it’s a way of life that forbids
the ingestion of any animal products, including dairy, eggs and fish.
The Atkins diet, on the other hand, consists of mostly animal products, primarily
parts of the animals themselves. The Atkins diet is also the one that forbids
sugar and carbohydrates; namely candy, potatoes and bread — otherwise
known as the things I cannot live without.
Needless to say, I live daily in a Twilight Zone world of paradoxes.
Dating a vegan is no picnic, or more precisely, it’s a meat-free, cheese-free
picnic with very limited menu choices. When my boyfriend first told me he was
a vegan, I took serious note of it and told myself I’d do my best to
show him my meat-free side.
On our second date, however, my meat-free side decided to stay at home while
I ordered deep-fried cheese perogies smothered in bacon. Oops. Luckily, my
boyfriend is a great cook and we enjoy lots of fun meals together that never
make me feel like I’m sacrificing anything.
At home, on the other hand, it’s Lent 24-7, which translates to no pop,
no potatoes, no ice cream, no white bread... and the list goes on.
Don’t get me wrong, my parents don’t keep me on a no-carb leash — I
am 22 years old, after all. I can eat what I want. My dad simply uses a different
tactic all together: reverse psychology.
He clucks “tsk tsk” when he sees me making a sandwich, shakes
his head in disappointment when I pour a glass of ginger ale and I swear I
saw a tear in his eye last week while he watched me scoop ice cream into a
bowl for a late-night snack. He thinks I’m slowly killing myself with
my bad eating habits and I have to live with the guilt.
Sadly, it’s become so unbearable that I’ve resorted to hiding
my “bad” food. There are cookies in my night stand and perogies
in the freezer under the bag of frozen beans. Don’t tell my dad.
I never thought something as delightful as eating could cause such political
uproar in my life. Maybe one day I’ll make a choice about living and
eating one way or the other, but for now, I’m enjoying the challenge.