June 10, 2004  
Volume 98, Issue 04  

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Sweat, speedos and shrinkage:
weather woes and quick fixes

By Lorraine Forster
and Sarah McMaster

Gazette Staff

Summer is a time to kick back, relax and look fabulous in your Speedo. How else are you going to pick up that hottie on the Dickie Dee cart?

But wait, summer isn’t all fun and games — disaster can strike when you least expect it! The heat, chlorine and blistering sun of the summer months can wreak havoc on your plans to snag that ice cream babe. Pit stains, embarrassing odours, those ghastly white thighs and chlorine-dyed hair: you name the problem, we have the solution.

1. Picture this: You’re walking up University College hill, it’s 30 degrees out and the sun is beating down on you. By the time you get to the top you’re wetter than a dog in heat and your stench could clear a room. So what can you do to combat this? Your first line of defense is to pull out the double shirt trick. Layer two tees together so that sweat hits the first one and the second one remains dry. Secondly, remember to choose an anti-perspirant over a deodorant. A deodorant only masks the smell while an anti-perspirant prevents it from forming. If you are truly a hopeless case, the Western Pharmacy suggests you try an over-the-counter anti-perspirant called Drysol which is available in a dab-on or solution formula.

2. There’s nothing worse in the summer than strolling casually down the beach and all of a sudden becoming blinded by the bright white thighs coming towards you. We’ve all experienced the farmer’s tan. Whether it’s the white raccoon eyes, the t-shirt line, or the No. 1 infamous tanning no-no (the sock tan), these summer crimes are unforgivable. Please, before you go out and cause serious retinal damage to passers-by, arm yourself with a bottle of self-tanner. Tip: stick to the high-end brands in order to avoid the tell-tale streaks. Men: it’s not feminine to roll up your shorts and catch a few rays every now and then. Your girlfriends will thank you.

3. Blondes take note: chlorine is not your friend. For all of you who hate the Oscar the Grouch look, listen up. Be sure to wear a cap when swimming lengths and spray in some leave-in conditioner before and after your swim. Our choice: Infusium leave-in conditioner. In order to rid your hair of chlorine infestation, wash it with UltraSwim shampoo. Now that you know how to avoid green-tinged hair, let’s move on to those frizzy afros that seem to strike when the weather heats up. Number 1 tip: don’t fight the humidity — work with it! Summer is the best time to unleash that curly mane. Even if you don’t have curly hair, trust us, you can make waves. For best results, apply mousse and hair spray to towel-dried hair, pile it all on the top of your head and then sleep on it.

4. Everyone loves to break out the strappy sandals in the summer, but this can also lead to deadly blisters. To prevent these painful foot enemies from emerging, try placing moleskin (available at your local drugstore) on the areas of your feet that rub in your sandals. If you’ve already got blisters, spray Second Skin on them to prevent them from getting worse.

5. Last but not least, one of summer’s largest mysteries. It’s a small problem that drives a lot of guys nuts (literally). Yes, it’s shrinkage. Come on guys, admit it, when you go swimming in cold water it may seem as though your boys abandon you in your time of need. While skinny-dipping in your neighbour’s pool may seem like a great idea for a first date, you may want to think again. Unfortunately there is no steadfast cure for shrinkage. All we can suggest is to avoid swimming in chilly temperatures when females are present.

checked out, try a new summer fragrance, kick your tanning salon habit.

6. Miscellaneous goals: Beat your dad’s beer drinking record set at your Aunt Sarah’s wedding or learn new languages so you can order food without tripping over the pronunciation.



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