Summer fun for lonely
By Ian Van Den Hurk
Over the course of summer, you might find yourself trapped alone
in London, completely bored out of your mind with nothing to do.
Since you haven’t found a job yet and your roommates have
ditched you for the comforts of living at home with mommy and daddy,
you’ll need to combat the boredom. Hence, we have compiled
a list of cheap, easy ideas that you can try over the summer to
exercise your mind and body all by yourself.
Watch a baseball game. With no Mustangs in town to watch, those
dying for some live sports can check out the London Majors of the
Intercounty Baseball League. The IBL carries some serious history,
currently holding its 85th season. The Majors make their home at
Labatt Park, and a full schedule can be found at www.icbaseball.com.
Develop a gambling addiction. While this is easily the most expensive
proposition on this list, it is potentially the most profitable.
You can always turn to the tired classics like Pro-Line, though
an even more intriguing opportunity is the horse track. Races are
held at the Western Fair on Tuesdays, Fridays and Saturdays. Drop
a few bucks on a horse, and hope for a big payoff. Better yet,
you’ll get a great workout every time you roll up enough
debt that you need to sprint for your life whenever you see your
Set up a hockey net in the driveway. With enough practice in the
driveway, you’ll be putting Ray Bourque to shame in the target
shooting competition. Come September, your roommates will be returning
from home, and they’ll be all fattened up from a summer of
mom’s cooking and not shooting hockey pucks. Challenge the
suckers for a case of beer and laugh maniacally as your buddies
launch pucks over the garage and into the neighbor’s yard.
Not only did you hone your skills all summer, now you can get drunk.
Invent your own game. Remember when Principal Skinner was trapped
in a basement with all those newspapers on top of him? He would
see how many times he could dribble a basketball in a day, and
then he’d try to break the record. If Skinner can maintain
sanity for a week, so can you! Find some sort of repetitive, inane
task that requires only the slightest physical dedication and ability,
and enjoy the fun. Just try to keep away from those towering stacks
Play solitaire. Ahhh, solitaire, the friend of the friendless.
At this point you’re getting desperate. A card game that
can be played all by your lonesome, solitaire seems to be an action-packed
and invigorating activity for anyone — or at least it would
seem that way to those kids that sat by themselves in the cafeteria
in high school. So if you can’t find a friend, find a deck
Dig a fire pit. Tossing “the man’s” unappealing
bylaws to the wayside, head into your backyard and start digging
a good old-fashioned fire pit. As far as firewood goes, I recommend
the skid. You can usually steal them from your local wholesale
grocery store, such as No Frills. They last long, burn great, and
if you stack a bunch of them up, you can have a big-ass fire. That
big-ass fire not only means cooking dogs and keeping the bugs away,
but the possibility of friends showing up to mooch — no more
solitaire for you, Fonzie!