For shame, Pita Pit: I've lost my faith

Tuesday, April 7th, 2009

Pita Pit, your falafel made me feel awful.

As a vegetarian, I try my best to maintain a healthy diet by eating ‘rabbit food,’ and what do I get? Salmonella poisoning. Is this a message from a higher power? Should I give up my efforts to maintain a healthy lifestyle and join the McDonald’s cult?

Yes, I am aware Pita Pit is not exactly the pinnacle of healthy food, but as a quick meal it’s one of the fresher options.

Apparently I was blind in assuming any fast food joint is safe. When the tasty meal I look forward to each week turned against me, my illusions of safety were quickly destroyed.

Up until now, if you asked me where to dine, I would have praised the Pit through and through. Little did I know evil bacterial minions were invading my body and plotting to destroy my intestinal tract while I munched on my wrap.

By Monday, I was doubled over in pain. I won’t go into graphic depictions of the items expelled from my body that day " let’s just say Hostel couldn’t hold a candle to it.

Genuinely concerned for my life by Tuesday morning, I booted it over to Student Health Services to speak with the docs. My physician greeted me with, “So you’ve got the runs, eh?”

Funny enough, he didn’t even ask me if I had been to Pita Pit lately. Of course, I visit the Pit at least once a week, so there’s no doubt in my mind the culprit was a delicious, but tainted, falafel.

While I trust the physician knew what he was doing, I wonder why he didn’t mention the students with Salmonella poisoning complained of the same ailment.

I’m sure you’re relieved to know my symptoms have improved, but my faith in Pita Pit has been dealt a blow. I am torn between the tempting taste of falafel and the threat of painful consequences.

Should I give up my healthy efforts and follow the crowds to Harvey’s and Pizza Pizza? I think I’ll at least steer clear of the Pit until I hear an explanation why the salmonella bacteria got into the food. Who knows if it was merely an overripe lettuce head, or if someone used the five-second rule a few too many times.

Although Western’s vegetarian options aren’t bad, I must admit my choices are dwindling. One can only eat so many salads and Harvey’s veggie burgers aren’t the best for my calorie count.

Pita Pit was my one haven " the spot I could depend on for a delicious and relatively healthy meal. Pita Pit, you have poisoned my love for you and now things aren’t the same.

I’m afraid it’s time to move on. Yes, that’s right " I’m switching to the veggie wraps at the Spoke. They’ve got feta cheese, and everyone knows you can’t beat feta cheese. Let’s not forget, they’re also about half the price of your falafel wraps.

I’m also waiting for a public apology. By Kindergarten, we all knew you apologize when you hurt someone. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure poisoning students " even if accidental " warrants an apology at the very least.

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